It seems that listicles are a blog thing now so I have decided to explore them. This one is not all nice, warm and fuzzy as some of the others will be. And please do not get me wrong, I really love Montréal, I am a French Québecor by birth, have lived here all my life, and there is much I adore about my home. I just needed to get this stuff off my chest. Not to worry, there will be a happy follow up to this post.
THINGS I DON'T UNDERSTAND ABOUT QUÉBEC:
1-How easy it is for Francophones to dismiss, treat rudely, speak in a condescending manner to, completely ignore, and basically make Anglophones feel like crap you can't wait to scrape off your shoe. Behavior, I would like to add, they would never tolerate being directed at them. Also, if you are an Anglophone, apparently no amount of job or life experience could possibly qualify you for jack in this province, and don't forget to smile and swallow the turd cupcake of rudeness you are handed every time you are reminded in the meanest fashion, of said fact.
2-How separatists think that separation from the rest of Canada is even viable? Has this been really thought through,seriously people? Let's touch on some things that need to be addressed.
What happens to the huge sums of money QC receives annually from the Federal government, (ie. Canada) that it NEEDS, or else would collapse into financial ruin without?
What currency would be used? Would a new special Qc dollar be created & who besides Qc would place any value on it?
What happens to those pesky Canadian passports? Gotta give those back because you're not Canadian, unless you need that privilege when in a war torn country, and there is no such thing as a QC consulate; is there?
Hmmm, still not a Canadian?
What happens to Anglophones who have worked and lived here for generations, contributed to this society, paid taxes and their dues, but are not perfectly bilingual? I guess shove them off in boats down the St Lawrence River and wish them all the best, while reclaiming their foolish Anglophone homes and property?
What about the natives who actually own this land and have the only right to claim it as their own and could understandably want to separate? It's not like the government has separated them from the rest of society, placed them on reservations, taken away their culture, waged genocide on them, and refused to respect treaties that were signed right?
Oh, wait...
What happens to the French separatists who say that the time for natives to take back possession of their land has passed? What do they do when the British show up and say the same thing to them, perhaps with painful reminders that they were defeated & were given the privilege of keeping their language and many traditions; which is historically uncommon for conquered people?
3-Why do we treat animals so badly? How is it that puppy mills are so prolific here, and that Quebec still has the worst reputation for them?
4-When did pork, poutine, and all things fried become part of "classy" Québec cuisine?
5-Why are there so many bad employers who get away with such horrid behavior? And when the regulatory board takes them to court; why aren't those douche bags forced to pay thousands in fines to the person they screwed over, back to the courts for the tax payer dollars that were wasted, and back to the government for man hours paid out, for crap they had to pay up anyways but chose to be a douche about cuz they could be?
6-What's with landlords trying to pass off craptacular, 18/19-take it easy, decrepit, tenement housing, as $1000+ "posh" apartments?Do we pay extra for the lovely cockroaches, rats, and mold or bed bugs?
7-How is it the STM cannot fix an escalator within less than 2-4 years, that doesn't keep breaking down? Anybody else would be fired after at least 6 months of this, wouldn't they be?
8-Crazy driver's who should never have been allowed to get behind the wheel of any vehicle, still have a valid license & don't get tickets for obvious traffic violations?
9-The nosebleed scam that passes for the driver's lessons/license certification in this province ($700-$1000+), which takes forever to get(over a year yah newb), looks forward to deliberately failing you to get more money you don't have, and still puts crap drivers on the road?
10-Salaries that are so low, you cannot survive, let alone live? Sure, we love being poor to the point of feeling suicidal.
11-Bosses expecting you to supply your own "nice, expensive" wardrobe, to said underpaid/will work you to death, cause injury, or mental instability, job? Sure thing boss, let me open the door to your Lexus as I distract you long enough to be able to steal a can of tuna for food for the next 2 weeks til my next joke of a pay.
12-Sidewalk sales with garbage nobody ever wanted or prices that are not really a sale, but they mingled it with other filler stuff at reduced prices, hoping you didn't notice.
13-You scumbags who still litter, wtf is wrong with you immature, lazy, disgusting animals? Actually, I apologize to any animals because they are clearly able to be cleaner and more responsible than you turds. I suppose having clean air, drinkable water, healthy soil, and a planet to live on is just not important to you? It's not like our planet is dying or anything. Whatever climate change disasters headed our way, that the scientific community has agreed upon, can't possibly be your responsibility now can it?
14-Is recycling really all that hard? I mean, it's not like it's new right? Been here since, what, 1980's? So exhausting walking 2 extra steps to the bin...
15-Wanting to attract tourist's to this place and making sure they know how hated they are, but only once you hear them speak any language other than Francaise? Asti tabarnak, those annoying people who spend money and contribute to local businesses, salaries and our economy! What were they thinking?
16-Pretending that racism is no longer a thing but making sure to insult a person by insisting that you don't see colour, while singling them out for your indignant wrath at any slight that baffles all the other's who are not of the colour you insist you don't see.
17-Language laws & enforcers so out of control that pasta gate is actually known outside of this province; you know they are laughing AT us, not with us? Thank God they don't know about the citation for that pet shop who had a bird greeting people in English.That would be really awkward. Pretty polly want a croustilles or a craquelins?
18-Way too many single mother's and student's living below the poverty line. I guess that eating, paying bills, rent, being able to afford medical needs, emergencies, proper clothes for every season, books, and all that nonsense is still a ridiculous expectation? I know let's give more taxpayer dollars to the corrupt losers who are either psychopaths or sociopaths, so a little thing like guilt won't overshadow their obscene spending habits.
19-Reasonable accommodation for others, at the expense of our own traditions; that others who came here were supposed to assimilate to? Is a Christmas tree so painfully offensive that one cannot possibly acclimatize to its decorated piney boughs? Oh! The horror!
20-What's with the women dying their hair an obnoxious shade of orange rust or that majorly blonde they go to such lengths to achieve while making sure to leave the roots showing?
21-When did we get so good at ignoring all the homeless people on the street and wearing a face of utter disdain at the mere mention of helping them out, and recognizing that many of them have serious mental health or addiction issues and were failed by budget cuts to a system that was already struggling? Don't get me started on the underage runaways on the streets who have suffered abuse and had to deal with more garbage at the hands of an uncaring, bureaucracy that passes for child "care" social services.
Did I miss any? Let me know in your comments down below, if this offended you, don't worry; there's plenty more where that came from.
THINGS I DON'T UNDERSTAND ABOUT QUÉBEC:
1-How easy it is for Francophones to dismiss, treat rudely, speak in a condescending manner to, completely ignore, and basically make Anglophones feel like crap you can't wait to scrape off your shoe. Behavior, I would like to add, they would never tolerate being directed at them. Also, if you are an Anglophone, apparently no amount of job or life experience could possibly qualify you for jack in this province, and don't forget to smile and swallow the turd cupcake of rudeness you are handed every time you are reminded in the meanest fashion, of said fact.
2-How separatists think that separation from the rest of Canada is even viable? Has this been really thought through,seriously people? Let's touch on some things that need to be addressed.
What happens to the huge sums of money QC receives annually from the Federal government, (ie. Canada) that it NEEDS, or else would collapse into financial ruin without?
What currency would be used? Would a new special Qc dollar be created & who besides Qc would place any value on it?
What happens to those pesky Canadian passports? Gotta give those back because you're not Canadian, unless you need that privilege when in a war torn country, and there is no such thing as a QC consulate; is there?
Hmmm, still not a Canadian?
What happens to Anglophones who have worked and lived here for generations, contributed to this society, paid taxes and their dues, but are not perfectly bilingual? I guess shove them off in boats down the St Lawrence River and wish them all the best, while reclaiming their foolish Anglophone homes and property?
What about the natives who actually own this land and have the only right to claim it as their own and could understandably want to separate? It's not like the government has separated them from the rest of society, placed them on reservations, taken away their culture, waged genocide on them, and refused to respect treaties that were signed right?
Oh, wait...
What happens to the French separatists who say that the time for natives to take back possession of their land has passed? What do they do when the British show up and say the same thing to them, perhaps with painful reminders that they were defeated & were given the privilege of keeping their language and many traditions; which is historically uncommon for conquered people?
3-Why do we treat animals so badly? How is it that puppy mills are so prolific here, and that Quebec still has the worst reputation for them?
4-When did pork, poutine, and all things fried become part of "classy" Québec cuisine?
5-Why are there so many bad employers who get away with such horrid behavior? And when the regulatory board takes them to court; why aren't those douche bags forced to pay thousands in fines to the person they screwed over, back to the courts for the tax payer dollars that were wasted, and back to the government for man hours paid out, for crap they had to pay up anyways but chose to be a douche about cuz they could be?
6-What's with landlords trying to pass off craptacular, 18/19-take it easy, decrepit, tenement housing, as $1000+ "posh" apartments?Do we pay extra for the lovely cockroaches, rats, and mold or bed bugs?
7-How is it the STM cannot fix an escalator within less than 2-4 years, that doesn't keep breaking down? Anybody else would be fired after at least 6 months of this, wouldn't they be?
8-Crazy driver's who should never have been allowed to get behind the wheel of any vehicle, still have a valid license & don't get tickets for obvious traffic violations?
9-The nosebleed scam that passes for the driver's lessons/license certification in this province ($700-$1000+), which takes forever to get(over a year yah newb), looks forward to deliberately failing you to get more money you don't have, and still puts crap drivers on the road?
10-Salaries that are so low, you cannot survive, let alone live? Sure, we love being poor to the point of feeling suicidal.
11-Bosses expecting you to supply your own "nice, expensive" wardrobe, to said underpaid/will work you to death, cause injury, or mental instability, job? Sure thing boss, let me open the door to your Lexus as I distract you long enough to be able to steal a can of tuna for food for the next 2 weeks til my next joke of a pay.
12-Sidewalk sales with garbage nobody ever wanted or prices that are not really a sale, but they mingled it with other filler stuff at reduced prices, hoping you didn't notice.
13-You scumbags who still litter, wtf is wrong with you immature, lazy, disgusting animals? Actually, I apologize to any animals because they are clearly able to be cleaner and more responsible than you turds. I suppose having clean air, drinkable water, healthy soil, and a planet to live on is just not important to you? It's not like our planet is dying or anything. Whatever climate change disasters headed our way, that the scientific community has agreed upon, can't possibly be your responsibility now can it?
14-Is recycling really all that hard? I mean, it's not like it's new right? Been here since, what, 1980's? So exhausting walking 2 extra steps to the bin...
15-Wanting to attract tourist's to this place and making sure they know how hated they are, but only once you hear them speak any language other than Francaise? Asti tabarnak, those annoying people who spend money and contribute to local businesses, salaries and our economy! What were they thinking?
16-Pretending that racism is no longer a thing but making sure to insult a person by insisting that you don't see colour, while singling them out for your indignant wrath at any slight that baffles all the other's who are not of the colour you insist you don't see.
17-Language laws & enforcers so out of control that pasta gate is actually known outside of this province; you know they are laughing AT us, not with us? Thank God they don't know about the citation for that pet shop who had a bird greeting people in English.That would be really awkward. Pretty polly want a croustilles or a craquelins?
18-Way too many single mother's and student's living below the poverty line. I guess that eating, paying bills, rent, being able to afford medical needs, emergencies, proper clothes for every season, books, and all that nonsense is still a ridiculous expectation? I know let's give more taxpayer dollars to the corrupt losers who are either psychopaths or sociopaths, so a little thing like guilt won't overshadow their obscene spending habits.
19-Reasonable accommodation for others, at the expense of our own traditions; that others who came here were supposed to assimilate to? Is a Christmas tree so painfully offensive that one cannot possibly acclimatize to its decorated piney boughs? Oh! The horror!
20-What's with the women dying their hair an obnoxious shade of orange rust or that majorly blonde they go to such lengths to achieve while making sure to leave the roots showing?
21-When did we get so good at ignoring all the homeless people on the street and wearing a face of utter disdain at the mere mention of helping them out, and recognizing that many of them have serious mental health or addiction issues and were failed by budget cuts to a system that was already struggling? Don't get me started on the underage runaways on the streets who have suffered abuse and had to deal with more garbage at the hands of an uncaring, bureaucracy that passes for child "care" social services.
Did I miss any? Let me know in your comments down below, if this offended you, don't worry; there's plenty more where that came from.
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